’ A loser’s lament, told by one who had a busy post-date self-flagellation session with Mr. Willie Blue Balls. I, too, was on the short end of the stick when it came to taking my own throws with Regan. I had convinced her to go to a few frat parties with me, and even a trip to Atlantic City for a social function with my frat buddies (yep, an abject disaster), but the best I could show for it was a cold-fish perfunctory goodnight kiss after three dates. It was time to move on, I reckoned, but that didn’t mean I ever stopped fantasizing about her. That’s why I was literally shocked dead in my tracks when, out of absolutely nowhere, over two-and-a-half decades later, I saw the e-mail inviting me to join her social network on one of the career web sites. Her photo was on her profile, too, and if possible, she looked even better than she had in the early 80’s. She looked like a modern-day Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis, jet black raven hair and immaculately attired, her firm, petite body still. ’ Fucking motherfucker… ‘Yeah, okay sounds great Tom… I’ll get on that after lunch.’ ‘Make it a short lunch Vince, there’s a lot of files to move… Oh and Vince, say hi to Jessica for me.’ Vincent paused and turned to look Tom in the eye, nodded and walked back into his office to grab his briefcase… Hey Tom, say hey to your daughter, she’s 18 now isn’t she? She’s looking really good lately. With all those sports she plays ‘n’ all, she free friday night? I should of fucking said that… God I’m paranoid… I need to smoke… Vincent sat in his Beamer smoking a cigarette and dialed his wife. ‘Hello?’ ‘Hey baby, want to meet me for lunch? Feel like some sushi? We can go to that new place on Main.’ ‘I can’t Vince, I need to put away the groceries and I wanted to clean the house today.’ ‘The house is clean baby, I can wait while you put the groceries away. Maybe I can take something to the house? Want a burger or sandwich or something?’ ‘I had some fruit earlier Vince, you go ahead. I’m.
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